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Monday, August 16, 2004

WHAT IS LIFE? By Waldo ‘D.R.’ Dobbs.

Life is just this thing that people do when they’re not totally dead, man.
There is, like, this other school of thought which believes life to be a bowl of cherries, but I submit that they can be clearly told apart by the following method: take the object under consideration and discharge a completely humungous shotgun into it from like, about this far away.
If it sort of makes this weird little ‘eeeeee/iik’ noise, kicks its legs up and down for a while and then lies still, it was probably life.
If, on the other hand, it just leaves this funny stain on the carpet but is otherwise totally unexceptional, then, in my opinion, it was probably a bowl of cherries, man. Better luck next time.

Taken from the introduction from ‘D.R & Quinch’s totally awesome GUIDE TO LIFE’ by Alan Moore & Alan Davis.


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